Jan Ash’s Story
Most people find Unity when they’re looking for a spiritual home. Jan found it because she lost her car…
Jan lived in Illinois and came intermittently to San Diego to help care for her daughter and son-in-law’s newborn son. She didn’t know anyone else in San Diego. During one of her trips she saw a flyer for a quilting class and decided she wanted to attend. After the class, she couldn’t find the car she had borrowed to get there. (Lots of nondescript gray cars in that parking lot.) Coincidence #1.
Beth had also attended that class and they started chatting together as Jan wandered around looking for her car. Beth asked Jan if she was going to make the wall hanging demonstrated in the class. Jan told her she actually lived in Illinois and didn’t have her sewing machine. Beth said she had four and invited her to sew at her home. Coincidence #2.
Beth was a member of Unity. Coincidence #3. Can you see where this is headed?
Fast forward a year. Now Jan has moved to San Diego permanently and is going through a painful divorce. Beth never pressured Jan to go to church. She just talked about what she was doing there and it sounded so nice. Jan decided to see what it was like for herself.
The first Sunday Jan came to Unity, Rev Wendy was starting a series of talks based on a book by Robert Brumet called “Finding Yourself in Transition.” Transitions have 3 separate parts Wendy explained: 1. an Ending, 2. the Void, and 3. a New Beginning. Jan understood she was in the “Void.” Wendy likened it to being in a long, dark hallway - one door has closed and the next hasn’t opened yet. You don’t know what your future holds. Tears started flowing as Wendy’s words touched her wounded heart. Reverend Will Newsom, the Associate Minister at the time, stopped Jan as she was leaving and invited her to pray. She went to the family room and continued to cry as he prayed. She continued to attend the prayer circle for several weeks afterward as it provided Jan with a feeling of connection and knowing she was in a safe place. Wendy continued to work her magic and her talks became Jan’s life line through that difficult time. A new Unity member was born. Coincidence?
She described TUC as being love at first sight and she started to attend. She met Jane McAllen, the previous manager of what was then the bookstore, and Jane took her under her wing. At that time, the services were recorded on CDs and Jane saved the extras and gave them to her on a regular basis. When Jan needed to travel back to Illinois to wrap up her life there, the CDs sustained her.
In looking back on meeting Beth, listening to Wendy’s messages, meeting Will and Jane, Jan knew that divine order had taken over and she was where she needed to be.
Fast forward again to another of Wendy’s series - this one was about forgiveness.
Wendy’s advice: Drop the victim attitude. Stop blaming another person for how you are feeling now. Take responsibility for your own feelings. What happened, happened. How you choose to deal with it - that’s on you! That was a transformative concept that propelled Jan forward towards healing. And because Jan was able to move forward, the rest of the family was led toward healing as well.
She loves the inspirational quotes given in service and she refers to them all week. She has 3 or 4 notebooks filled with them. The Four Agreements series has been very helpful to her – especially in not taking things personally.
Jan loves the mixture of the lessons, she likes the education of Buddhist influence, the Bible, and all of the “ah ah” moments she receives on a regular basis.
If Jan had to describe TUC in one word it would be POSITIVE – it all speaks to your heart. When she walked in Wendy was talking to her. Jan shared that we need to be broken open to receive what we need – and that HEALING is a good word too. We all need healing.
Jan felt the need to give back because she had been given so much. She had some personal struggles that she received a lot of support with and will be forever grateful for it. She needed the wider perspective in her life. Jane giving her the CDs “kept her afloat in a positive boat.”
She volunteered in what was the bookstore and is now Partners in Fair Trade Center, she co-facilitates Life Groups, helps with cleaning, started out answering the phones, provided support in the Youth Village, and strives to respond to whatever is needed. She loves to give back and said if no one is giving, how long will the church last? She wants to see it continue to sustain itself - if you value something you help it grow and support it.